Tuesday, October 3, 2006

Realizations of Average

I have recently come to think of myself as the perfectly average, middle class, middle of America posterchild. My childhood saw are circle around the Heartland, growing up in Indiana, Illinois, Minnesota, Nebraska, and Kentucky. I'm 5' 8'', 160 lbs., and Caucasian. I drive a Ford (and would rather bike it, but don't due to route safety and suburban sprawl). I played sports throughout my childhood, but wasn't good enough for college. I'm a Catholic Christian. I like computers and cars and action movies. Almost every article of clothing I own came from 3 sources: the aforementioned sports' teams, Old Navy, or Kohl's. I think Outback is a fancy restaurant. I'm not a fan of abortion, but I don't think felonizing the practice will save any more babies. If two dudes want adopt one of those potentially aborted babies and start a family, I don't see how that is a bad thing. Doesn't mean it's going to be my life choice. I wouldn't mind if marijuana was legal, especially if it meant that Kentucky schools would get a nice tax kickback from the state's biggest cash crop. Doesn't mean I'm gonna start toking. I own a cell phone and a digital camera. So do half of our country's 8th graders. I don't have an iPod. My grandparents are registered Democrats. My parents are registered Republicans.

The first point I'm trying to make is, if there is some proverbial FENCE out there, I live my life trotting upon it. From this perspective, my outlook on life possesses at least one of two characteristics: I understand the Middle, and/or I don't get the Extremes.

Which brings me to my second point. Who out there in our country is really that extreme? If the last presidential election was a good indicator, then America is rather...average. If every ballot cast in America was decided by a coin flip (donkey or elephant), we would have had almost the exact same popular election results. Normal distribution? I wonder what Pete Williams would say...

In the words of a band ironically named 'War', "Why can't we be friends, Why can't we be friends?"

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